Laurie and I were watching television together. She was sitting next to me, and I had my arm around her. We had been watching a romantic movie and as it was coming to an end, she snuggled up closer. Then she reached up for my hand and pulled my arm tighter around her, holding my hand in both of hers.
Laurie is an affectionate wife, and we both enjoy the physical affection we share in our marriage. It is a romantic and enjoyable end in itself, but then, too, it sometimes leads to further developments. Tonight, I was beginning to feel some very familiar stirrings.
Percy Sledge had a number one hit in 1966:
When a man loves a woman,
Can't keep his mind on nothing else.
He'll trade the world
For the good thing he's found.
It was a smash hit and stayed on the charts for ten weeks. Even today, it is often played in various romantic settings.
However, I have often thought that someone should write a romantic song that zeros in on one particular aspect of love. We could entitle it, "When a Man Desires a Woman."
In a marriage, a man should have a sexual desire for his wife. It is a vital ingredient to keep the marriage strong and happy. Over the years that Laurie and I have been married, I have given much thought to the nature of the desire I have for Laurie. Unfortunately, I am no poet, and someone else will need to write the song. But I know what sparks my desire for her, what sustains it, and what builds it to a spectacular, passionate climax. Better yet, Laurie also knows.
Tonight there were multiple factors at work. It had been several nights since we last made love, and we had just watched a cute, romantic movie. Laurie was in a sweet, affectionate mood. She was also wearing her light-pink leggings. I try to look reasonably pleasing for Laurie, even when I am lounging around the house, and we both believe that it is also important for Laurie to look attractive to me. Attractive in both senses: in the sense of looking pretty and in the sense of sexual attraction. If in a healthy marriage a man should find his wife sexy, then she should not be shy about looking sexy.
Well, I certainly think Laurie looks very sexy in leggings. Being a leg man, and having a high degree of appreciation for the female derriere, I thoroughly enjoy watching her in this outfit. Leggings reveal every delicate curve in her figure. But there is also an added benefit: pantylines!
Yes, a small thing, to be sure. I doubt whether a pinup will ever feature pantylines on a model wearing tight slacks. But I find little things like this to be immensely exciting, made even more so, perhaps, by their totally unostentatious nature in a completely casual setting. They start the male imagination working, and they stir the desires.
Pantylines definitely start my male imagination working. I have always found panties to be the sexiest part of women's lingerie. "Real" panties, that is. I have never thought bikinis were very sexy, much less those ridiculous thongs. Panties should conform to the natural curves of the body, hugging and accentuating those mathematically convex surfaces between waist and thigh. So Laurie always wears the full-cut variety.
Tonight the effects were especially alluring. The material in her leggings was light and so was the color. Therefore, as Laurie walked around, I could see the entire outline of her panties--and when she bent over, even a silhouette of the floral pattern on the pair she was wearing this evening.
Understandably, then, I was now in a pretty romantic mood, and I found my desire for Laurie building. After the movie ended, and we shut off the TV. Then followed the usual routines of letting the dogs out for the last time, brushing teeth, and turning out lights throughout the house.
Laurie normally sleeps in an oversized tee shirt that covers just, though not quite always, the essentials. She already had her nightshirt on and was sitting on the edge of the bed as I came in from the bathroom. I quickly got onto the bed on top of the bedcovers, massaged her shoulders for a few seconds, and then gently laid her down. Laurie was on her back and I snuggled up beside her. Cradling her head with one hand, I began to caress her thighs with the other. She turned her head toward me, and we kissed softly. I brought my hand slowing under her nightshirt, first touching just the leg band of her panties, tracing it as it disappeared in front, then drawing my hand upward to gently embrace their full expanse as she lay there. I enjoyed the stimulating sensation of that silky material on my hand. Laurie closed her eyes and leaned her head back slightly. I moved my hand slowly upward again and began caressing her breasts. At this point she reached up and wrapped her hand tenderly around the back of my neck. Drawing me to her, she gave me a short, sweet kiss.
As the kiss ended, Laurie gently touched my face and said, "You sure seem to be in a romantic mood tonight."
I brushed her hair back behind her ears and returned the kiss. "Yeah, I'm ready for some mad, passionate love-making."
She laid her hand on the side of my face and then ran her fingers through my hair around the back of my head. "No, not tonight. We'll just snuggle here in bed. Come on," she said soothingly, "let's get under the covers."
Her nightshirt was still askew, and Laurie had drawn her foot up, raising one knee. I looked down at her panties. Yes, I wanted her, but it would not be tonight. A familiar excitement swept over me.
I smiled and got up to pull the bedcovers down. Laurie did the same. Naturally, I had a strong erection at this point, and when I stood up, this was very apparent. I reached into my shorts and forced everything back into place. Since I do not wear boxers, everything stayed in place, although with some strain on the material. Laurie, still standing beside the bed, was watching all this out of the corner of her eye, her head tilted slightly, and evidently quite amused. With a small coquettish smile on her lips, she briefly flipped up the back of her nightshirt and bent over just slightly to give me a quick flash of panties. Then she got into bed, and I quickly joined her. I was on my back and wrapped my arm around her as she laid her head on my shoulder and her hand on my chest. I was smiling at her antics, and soon we were asleep.
It is not unusual for Laurie to say no. We have come up with some strategies that have really added a lot of fun to our sex life. In fact, Laurie has developed a whole philosophy with regard to the issues of "when" and "how often." Maybe it would not work for every couple--we certainly are no marriage experts! But here is how it came about.
For the first few years of our marriage, we pretty much operated on the principle that Laurie would give me sex every time I wanted it. If there were any rare exceptions, I cannot remember them. But this eventually had an effect on our sex life that is difficult to put into words. I am a man of routine and pattern in the way I function, and so our sex life slowly began to follow a predictable pattern. Somehow this seemed to reduce the excitement.
Then about a year ago Laurie read this article, "How to Say No in a Sexy Way." That prompted her to look into the whole matter in more detail, and she read several books on sex and marriage that dealt with this issue. One day she explained her new strategy to me.
We had been relaxing in the living room that evening. I was reading an Agatha Christie mystery, and Laurie was staring into space with a decidedly contemplative expression on her face. Then out of the blue she said, "You know, I think we need to do something to spice up our sex life."
Now that was a rather startling statement to say the least! She focused her pretty eyes on me and flashed one of her cute, coy smiles.
I was really quite dumbfounded but thought Laurie left herself wide open for some teasing.
"You mean you think we should start having sex every night?"
She scowled. "No, now be serious. Haven't you noticed that it's become too routine, too predictable? There's no mystery to it any more, no surprises, especially for you. I've been doing some reading about this. Mystery and surprises are important. They keep sex exciting.
"Now just picture this..." Laurie leaned forward and used the appropriate hand gesture that indicates a forthcoming conjecture worthy of serious consideration. Her eyes twinkled mischievously as she looked at me and spoke slowly:
"If a wife sometimes said...no...well, she could add some real pizzazz, keep the mystery alive, and make herself more alluring, more desirable."
Then with her best flirty demeanor, she continued, "It would have other benefits as well. I could always feel free to wear the kind of sexy underwear you like so much. I wouldn't have to worry about putting ideas in your head when I might not be in the mood. And I could be very affectionate every day." Laurie emphasized the word very. "These things are all real important to a marriage, you know. A lot of books emphasize the importance of daily affection, holding hands, snuggling, and...being sexually appealing."
Laurie had obviously planned what she would say ahead of time, but it was a lot for me to digest all at once. However, the points she made seemed to make sense.
And the thought that Laurie might on occasion say no was curiously exciting. Strange...
I looked up at Laurie. She was literally sitting on the edge of her seat watching me intently. Her eyes showed eagerness, anticipation. She was obviously very excited about this idea.
I knew that Laurie enjoyed making love with me and was not using this idea as some means of getting out of having sex. I was quite secure in this confidence. The brightness in her face right now showed that she really wanted to make sex even better and thought that this approach would do that.
But what should my reaction be? What red-blooded man would admit that his wife should say no sometimes? When he wants sex, he wants sex. Simple, right?
"You really think this would make things more exciting?" I asked.
"More exciting for both of us!"
Laurie smiled and came over to where I was sitting. She put her hand tenderly on my face. In soft, sweet tone she said, "Think of it this way, Terry: men are wired to be the pursuers, and they enjoy the pursuit...the challenge. But there's not much tenseness or thrill to a pursuit if you know the outcome ahead of time. This'll make it better for both of us." Then she smiled provocatively and added, "So from now on, you'll just have to work a little harder to get your way with me."
At that, she sauntered back to her chair with a sexy swing in her hips, content and pleased at the way she had concluded our discussion.
So Laurie began her new strategy and no longer let me make love to her every time I wanted to. She really did seem sexier when she said no, probably that "forbidden fruit" concept at work. I also seemed more anxious than usual to put my arm around her and snuggle up to her as we went to sleep on those nights. Laurie herself seemed to be extra affectionate.
Well, that was almost a year ago now, and Laurie was right--her strategy did make our sex life more exciting. When she says no, it increases my desire for her. The next day I cannot wait to have her. It is fun trying to come up with better strategies to seduce her. Laurie really enjoys that!
It also intensified the thrill of anticipation. Laurie was right about the pursuit. I found that it was more fun making my frequent advances precisely because I did not know whether they would be successful. It brought back that tingling excitement that you used to have on dates when you nervously started to kiss a girl but didn't know if she would let you do it.
Then, too, it gave me a sense of freedom. I have a very active libido and now can make sexual advances whenever I feel the slightest urge. I do not have to worry about frequency or propriety of timing or place; I do not have to try to read her moods before deciding whether to make an advance; and I never have to worry about getting an angry or annoyed response. Sometimes we make wonderful love; sometimes Laurie says no.
Now back to the present. We had watched that romantic movie last night, and my advances had been turned down. So today I was really ready for some hot passion! We often make love the night after Laurie says no, but not always: sometimes, in her tantalizing way, she makes me wait another night or two. But you can be sure I usually try!
This time I made sure I was in the bedroom while Laurie was undressing. She was sitting on the side of the bed and had gotten down to her bra and panties when I snuggled up behind her. I put my arms around her and took her breasts in my hands. "How about tonight?" I asked. "Are you in the mood for love?" I kissed the side of her neck. "You look really sexy sitting here."
Laurie swung around to face me and put her arms around me, and I thought she was about to kiss me. But instead, she leaned close to my ear and whispered in her best sultry voice, "No sex tonight." Giggling a little, she got up, took off her bra, put on her nightshirt, and went into the bathroom.
But since I had been thinking about sex most of the day, a new idea had hit me: perhaps my best method of seduction yet! Laurie was not the only one who could add pizzazz to our sex life! I recalled from the movie, Pretty Woman, that in response to Edward's "seduction scene," Vivian had thanked him but pointed out that she was "a sure thing," making the whole ritual unnecessary. But Laurie was not a sure thing any more, and maybe Edward's method would come in very handy. So on my way home today, I had picked up a dimmer switch at the hardware store. I had also purchased a few essential items at the grocery store. Then earlier in the evening while Laurie was not around, I quickly installed the switch and made some preliminary preparations in the kitchen. If she had been eager for love tonight, well, no harm done. But now I decided to execute my plan. While Laurie was in the bathroom, I went into the kitchen and retrieved the items I needed. Then I dimmed the light in the bedroom.
When she came back out, I was again sitting on the bed. Laurie stopped in the doorway with a puzzled look on her face. Without moving her head, her eyes looked around the dimly-lit room. "What happened to the light?" she asked.
This time it was my turn for one of those wry smiles. "I'm simulating soft candlelight."
Laurie did not say anything, but a faint smile appeared. I could see that the wheels were beginning to turn in her head.
I had propped both of our pillows up against the headboard of the bed so that we could assume a comfortable sitting position.
"Come on over. Let's sit for a few minutes. I have a special surprise for you.
I got up from the bed and took her hand, gently stroking her fingers as I led her to the bed and helped her down. As she put one leg up and then the other, I was treated to a quick flash of panties. Lightening bolts seemed to discharge in my head, and an aura of intense sexuality seemed to fill the room. My heart was starting to pound.
As she leaned back against the headboard, Laurie straightened out her nightshirt, covering all but a tantalizing hint of her panties.
I turned around and walked over to the dresser and brought back our silver serving tray with two glasses of champagne on it. It also contained a small dish of sliced strawberries, just as in Pretty Woman.
Now Laurie broke out with a bright, sweet smile. I offered her the tray, which she obviously had not noticed as she walked back into the bedroom. With a slow and deliberate movement, she took one of the strawberries. As her eyes held mine captive, she parted her lips and placed it daintily in her mouth.
"It brings out the flavor of the champagne," I said, just as Edward had explained.
I continued to hold the tray for her, and she reached out again for a glass of champagne. She sensuously moistened her lips and took a sip.
My own mouth was beginning to water, but not for champagne. I thought I was supposed to be seducing her!
With much effort, I regained some presence of mind, took the other glass of champagne and got onto the bed next to Laurie. On my side of the bed, I had the decanter of champagne. When we finished our first glass, I reached down for the champagne and refilled both glasses. Again, Laurie got a look of astonishment on her face. She smiled and slowly shook her head in amazement.
"I know what's going on here," she said in a sweet tone. "I've heard all about mashers who ply a girl with champagne in order to weaken her resolve and get their way with her."
"Such motives you attribute to me!" I said in a tone of exaggerated indignation. I put my arm tenderly around her and kissed her on the cheek. "You said no tonight. Would I try to weaken your resolve with champagne?"
However, while those words were yet on my lips, my other hand had found her leg, and I began a light caress of her inner thigh, slowly bringing the caresses higher and higher.
"I think...you...would..." Her voice trailed off to a whisper, as she obviously was losing her resolve.
Laurie closed her eyes and leaned her head back. I had reached the top of her thigh and drew my hand slowly under her nightshirt and onto her panties. Her head swayed just a bit, and she was breathing harder.
I raised her nightshirt, little-by-little exposing first the leg bands, then more and more of her panties. Laurie had on her red ones tonight--a bright, silky red with just enough spandex to hug every curve. With gentle caresses, I began to explore the satiny material. It was evident that Laurie was becoming aroused, and she moaned softly.
I put both arms around her and gently helped her lie down. My own desire was soaring now, and I kissed her hard on the lips.
We made sweet, passionate love.
We went to sleep with my arm around her and with both of us very satisfied.
I let two nights go by before making another sexual advance.
"So soon?" Laurie asked. "No, I don't think so." She paused and leaned her head back with a decidedly dreamy look in her eyes. "I'm still luxuriating in my romantic memories of that incredibly erotic fantasy we had--when was it? It seems like just an hour ago!"
That sounded very sweet, of course, but it was just the female way of saying it was too soon--we needed more time to build up the intensity of our desires to a more feverish pitch.
But I was ready with my response!
I knew I should not overuse a good thing, but that "seduction scene" from Pretty Woman had been so much fun and such an obvious success that I could not resist trying the ploy again.
"Well, since you found that so incredibly erotic, have I got a surprise for you!" I turned the lights down low again.
Laurie cocked her head slightly, but she said nothing. I went through the whole routine again, and I must say with even more flair than the first time.
Laurie ate the strawberries and drank the champagne, a bit matter-of-factly, I thought, but with obvious contentment and enjoyment. She was clearly relishing this "seduction scene" I was lavishly unfolding.
We finished our third glass, and as I helped her down, she started to giggle a little. I pushed up her nightshirt and looked down at her solid white panties. They had just a hint of dainty lace along the leg bands. How this sight really turns me on! With both hands I started massaging her legs higher and higher. Then cradling her in my arms, I inclined my head toward her ear and whispered, "Have you changed your mind?"
Laurie turned her head toward me, wiggled her nose against mine, and then kissed me. With just a hint of a smile, she looked up and said, "No."
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